The other night, I tucked my child into bed.
Lights off.
Blanket tucked in.
Goodnight kiss.
I thought...
"Success. We made it to bedtime."
Then came the questions.
"Do fish sleep?"
"Can astronauts take dogs to space?"
"What if dinosaurs were still alive?"
"Tomorrow can we make pancakes?"
"Did I feed my stuffed monkey dinner?"
"I think I hear an owl."
"Can owls wear glasses?"
At this point I wasn't sure if we were going to sleep or accidentally starting a late-night podcast.
If you've ever experienced bedtime with a child, you probably know exactly what I'm talking about.
Their brain is everywhere.
One thought leads to another.
Then another.
Then somehow you've gone from brushing teeth to wondering if penguins have knees.
Welcome to Monkey Mind.
So... What Is Monkey Mind?
Imagine a little monkey swinging through the trees.
It jumps from branch to branch without stopping.
That's exactly what our thoughts can do.
One minute your child is thinking about math homework.
The next they're wondering what dinosaurs ate.
Then they remember they forgot their water bottle.
Now they're humming a song they heard three days ago.
Then they suddenly need to tell you a joke.
Monkey Mind isn't bad.
In fact, it's often a sign of a wonderfully curious, creative imagination.
Kids are natural explorers.
Their brains are constantly making connections.
The challenge is that sometimes those busy thoughts make it hard to focus, relax, or even fall asleep.
My Child's Brain Is Like Twenty Browser Tabs
The best way I've ever heard it described is this.
Imagine opening your computer.
You have one tab open.
Easy.
Now imagine opening twenty-five tabs.
One starts playing music.
One freezes.
One has a recipe you'll probably never make.
One reminds you to buy toothpaste.
Another is a video of baby goats wearing pajamas.
Somehow they're all open at once.
That's what Monkey Mind can feel like.
It's not that kids are trying to be distracted.
Their brains are simply busy.
Really, really busy.
(And if we're honest... ours are too.)
We All Have a Monkey Mind Sometimes
I used to think Monkey Mind was just a kid thing.
Then one morning I walked into the laundry room...
...and completely forgot why I was there.
Five minutes later I found myself reorganizing a shelf.
Then answering a text.
Then making coffee.
Still no laundry.
Sound familiar?
Adults just have older monkeys.
You Don't Have to Chase Every Thought
Here's something I've been trying to teach my kids.
Just because your brain has a thought...
doesn't mean you have to grab onto it.
Imagine sitting by a river watching leaves float by.
Each leaf is a thought.
Some are exciting.
Some are silly.
Some are worries.
Some are reminders.
You can notice them...
...without jumping into the river after every single one.
That idea has been a game changer in our house.
Instead of saying,
"Stop thinking about that."
We say,
"I think your monkey is doing a lot of swinging today."
It usually gets a giggle.
And suddenly those busy thoughts don't feel quite so overwhelming.
Helping Kids Find Their Focus Beam
One of the things I've learned is that focus isn't about making the monkey disappear.
It's about gently inviting it to sit down for a little while.
Some days that looks like taking three slow breaths.
Sometimes it's coloring.
Sometimes it's stretching.
Sometimes it's reading one page at a time instead of worrying about the whole book.
Little by little, kids discover that they can guide their attention back when it wanders.
Not perfectly.
Just gently.
Because that's exactly what brains do.
They wander.
And then we bring them back.
Again and again.
That's Why I Created the Mighty Mind Workbook
Monkey Mind is one of my favorite sections inside the 100-page Mighty Mind Workbook because I wanted kids to realize they're not "bad at focusing."
They're simply learning how their amazing brains work.
The workbook is filled with playful activities that help children recognize busy thoughts, strengthen focus, build confidence, and develop important social emotional learning skills through games, drawing, reflection, and imagination.
It's not about creating perfect little robots who sit still all day.
It's about helping kids understand that they have the power to gently guide their thoughts instead of letting their thoughts run the whole show.
Maybe Monkey Mind Isn't Something to Fix
Maybe it's something to understand.
After all, the same child who can't remember where they left their shoes...
...is often the one inventing incredible stories.
The one asking the most fascinating questions.
The one who notices things the rest of us walk right past.
Monkey Mind comes with a lot of wonderful gifts.
Our job isn't to make the monkey disappear.
It's to help our kids become friends with it.
To teach them that even when their thoughts are bouncing all over the place, they have a quiet little focus beam inside them that's always there when they need it.
And honestly...
I think that's a pretty mighty superpower.
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